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NOTE: Assrockers' drummer Shang-Hi Skorz is currently on holiday at
an undisclosed Caribbean locale and could not be reached for comment.


Does having a name like Assrockers create an image that would
prohibit you from writing a tender love ballad?

Riff Rokkwell: I wouldn't say we're limited by our name in any manner.
When we started out all of our songs were kind of goofs. As time has
gone by, we've tackled more serious subject matter, such as drag
racing and natural disasters. Why not a love ballad?

Bison Roughbottom: Prohibit us? Not in the least... each and every
song we write is a tender love ballad--love of sex, love of cars,
love of rocking. 

Killer-T Roxx: What do you mean by "tender"?

Misty Stainz: Obviously you haven't heard our ballad "24 Hours" on
our second CD - All Inputs. The chorus sums it up… "24 hours of
passion, 24 hours of sin, 24 hours of you between my legs,
again and again and again." That's tender,isn't it?

Are you fans of The Darkness? Are they for real or are they poking
fun at hard rock? Or both?

Riff Rokkwell: Absolutely. They're onto something similar to us.
Rock'n'roll is about having a good time. I'm the biggest fan of 80s
metal in the band, and as soon as I heard The Darkness I thought, "Wow,
these guys are taking it a step further than we even have!" Let's
hope they blaze the way for great hard rocking, tongue in cheek, heavy
rock for the new millennium. Based on what they say, they are 100%
serious. When you listen to the vocals you can hear a lot of
Freddie Mercury. The guitars are very Thin Lizzy. Their sound is
too well developed to be a joke. These guys really like this music.

Bison Roughbottom: I'm proud to say that I introduced the band to The
Darkness. While my bandmates might not share my enthusiasm for them, I
am a definitely a fan. And as far as the whole "are they serious or
are they a joke" debate, all I can say is "Who cares and why does
it matter?" I put Permission to Land on the hi-fi and it puts a
shit-eating grin on my face. End of story.

Killer-T Roxx: Judging by what they've said about their music,
I'd say that The Darkness are very serious about bringing the rock with
as little baggage as possible. Is that poking fun? No, it's just the
spirit of that kind of music. The more I play big rock, the more I've
come to see it as a pure musical form. It's not about message, it's
about experience. I think Assrockers share this  vibe and we're very
glad that they are getting people hip to it.

Misty Stainz: I think The Darkness are emulating Queen. They are poking
fun and they are for real, in my opinion. They just love the rock and
the tight outfits.

Would you say Assrockers are more Left Wing or Right Wing?

Riff Rokkwell: I like wings. All kinds of wings… Buffalo
wings, Teriyaki wings, you name it!

Bison Roughbottom: I can't speak for the band, but me, I'm more of a
breast man myself.

Killer-T Roxx: I played left wing on my grade school soccer team.

Misty Stainz: We're hot wings. Very hot.

Do you feel Rock Music is an appropriate vehicle for promoting
social change?

Riff Rokkwell: We've debated this subject quite a few times amongst
ourselves. I think that musicians and rock bands can turn people on
to things or issues that they might not typically associate with.
There's a certain power to that. But can you actually implement
any type of change? I don't know. We will continue to play benefit
concerts to help raise awareness and funds for causes we believe in.
I hope it makes a difference to some people. I have the sneaky
suspicion that Assrockers will not change the world though.

Bison Roughbottom: Appropriate? Who the hell am I to say what's
appropriate or not? I'm just here to rock and the only social "changes"
I'm concerned about are changing non-fans into fans, showing uptight
people everywhere that it's okay to loosen up a bit, and blowing
peoples' minds with a kick-ass live show.

Killer-T Roxx: Promote social change? Not any more. When rock was
young it had the ability to say something to people. But even then
it was mostly limited to a "rebel against something" message without
being very focused. Rock is about rebellion, but it's not good on
specifics.

Misty Stainz: Sure. It can be a vehicle--music has always been a vehicle
for social change, be it rock, pop, jazz, gospel, etc. Whether it's
appropriate or not depends on the circumstance. If it's for the better,
like equal rights, etc., then yeah… it's definitely okay.

Have you ever Rocked someone's ass a little too hard?

Riff Rokkwell: As a matter of fact, there were two casualties at our
very first show. One girl had her ass rocked so hard she took quite
a fall down some stairs and had to be taken to the hospital for a
broken wrist. The same night another fan literally passed out on her
feet. In the early days the ladies just could not handle the power 
of Assrock.

Bison Roughbottom: Every chance I get.

Misty Stainz: Hell… we've even
rocked babies in wombs.

What was the best show you've ever played?

Riff Rokkwell: There have been so many great shows over the past
couple of years. It's tough to pick one as the best. Obviously
playing the 9:30 Club with The Datsuns was a huge highlight. Also
right up there is playing CBGB with our buds from NYC. That was a
monumental night.

Bison Roughbottom: We've played quite a few amazing and memorable
shows. Our first show in New York, our show with the Datsuns at
the 9:30 Club... That said, the "best" show we've played yet was
our DC Spore show last summer at the Blue Nile. Sure we've played
bigger shows on better sounds systems at "real" clubs, but that
was the show where everything clicked for us as band. I think that
performance really set the stage for some incredible shows during
the latter part of 2003.

Killer-T Roxx: The benchmark shows we've played have been awesome
for the scrapbook--CBGBs, 9:30 Club, Black Cat. From a performance
standpoint, the Black Cat has the best sound and stage space I've
experienced. In the end, the best shows are all about the lineup
and the crowd. You get three assrock bands in the middle of a near
riot crowd and it just doesn't matter where you're playing. 

Misty Stainz: November 21, 2003. The Black Cat. I felt like a rock
star that night.

Why haven't you guys moved to LA or NY? What keeps you in DC?

Riff Rokkwell: What does LA got that DC doesn't? NY? In a scene
like DC, a band like the Assrockers really stands out. Were we
to move to LA or NYC, I think we'd get lost in the muck. Not to
mention be a lot poorer. 

Bison Roughbottom: The people of DC need their asses rocked on a
regular basis. It wouldn't be fair to leave them now that they're
hooked on our sweet sounds.

Killer-T Roxx: All my stuff is in DC.

Misty Stainz: We keep it real. Besides, we enjoy being big fish
in the little pond that is DC.

8- What's the biggest mistake you guys have ever made as a band?

Riff Rokkwell: We've definitely made some mistakes, but I feel
fortunate to truly say that I'm very happy with where this band is
at this point in time. 

Bison Roughbottom: Hard saying... we've been lucky over the past
few years and owe a good chunk of our success to our fans -- the
members of the Global Assrock Conspiracy.

Killer-T Roxx: Other than buying some shitty PA speakers, we've led
a pretty charmed life. I hope that luck is still with us when we
have to buy a van.

Misty Stainz: The band had its first Washington CityPaper interview
while I was visiting my grandma and I didn't get to participate.

What are you most proud of?

Riff Rokkwell: Making a name for ourselves in a scene that doesn't
exactly embrace metal music. Playing up and down the East Coast. 

Bison Roughbottom: I'm proud of all of it... the band, the idea,
the songs, the fans, the shows. I don't think anyone ever expected
any of this, certainly not me. I'm definitely enjoying the ride and
think the best is yet to come.

Killer-T Roxx: Taking this band and the concept behind it to where
it is today and beyond. Especially in a town that's may not be ready
for it just yet.

Misty Stainz: I am most proud of our ability to work together as a team. 

What one piece of advice would you give to a new band just starting out?

Riff Rokkwell: Keep rocking. Don't go away. Treat your band mates
like brothers and make music that makes you happy. 

Bison Roughbottom: Shit matters. Take pride in your work. Love your
bandmates. And be prepared to bust your ass.

Killer-T Roxx: Believe in your band, practice your ass off,
and buy a tuner.